The Source

Inspiration….something that you need at every stage of your life. Some are internally inspired, for some it comes from the people they met and for me…to be very frank I really don’t know, I don’t know who all were and are magnet to my pieces of inspiration but I would never forget two, the most important source, till date in my life. Those two had an everlasting effect on my doings. First is Pankaj bhaiya and second Ramanan Sampath, he was my senior. They never said big words, but somehow they gave what really is needed to get motivated. Such magnetizing personalities they have, can only admire. Now I want to share how they inspired me. At first about Ramanan….

“Ramanan” as delightful as the name. Met him in my first year after I got selected for “Quark Controls”. I still remember I was sitting with all the selected students, all other co-ordinators came, explained the work we are gonna do and went. At last, he came with a big smile on his face. He spoke just for 5min, but not only he spoke, he came he saw he delivered. That was the first time I saw anyone so confident in his/her approach. He always has a pleasant personality both during and off the work. His approach taught me how to be a professional yet playful, to be straightforward & still right all at the same time. He always gave chance and used to put faith in his juniors which I think is most important when you are working in a team, irrespective of how capable you think the person is, as he/she may turn out to be better than you. Because of all this, I owe my professional ethics to him to a great extent.

Now Pankaj bhaiya….

“Pankaj” as soft & fresh as a “lotus flower”, totally in accordance with the name. I don’t know from where I should start, though didn’t had lot of time with him but still whatever time I had, I was always thrilled by his elegant presence. He is like “Roger Federer”, have you seen him playing those mesmerizing and elegant shots? that’s how my brother is, totally flawless. His presence has always taught me how to be hard from outside and soft from within, to speak less and only when required, to believe yourself, to have a long vision and to respect everyone’s ideas even when they mean nothing to you. So many more things about him but I am short of words now.

I am very sure it has happened to you also. But sometimes we tend to ignore these things but they matters and not only matters they define where we go and what would be our destination. So whenever you feel like today someone has taught me a lesson…wait there, pause for some time and think over it. It may or may not help but either way there is nothing to lose so why so much hurry in life, have patience,  its a long journey and a long way to go.

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Mind-boggling

For last few days, don’t know why I am so obsessed with Inception Sound Track – Time, can’t express it in normal words, its not inspirational but still a seed to many thoughts. Here is a short poem on how I feel after listening it.

Listen this – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0kGAz6HYM8

Atypical feelings it gave, can’t do anything but praise.
Recalled old memories, pain and the anger which came.
The music sounds slow and yet so fast in reminding all the past.
Now can’t see anything but mysteries of my life ready to unroll.
The beats were heavy, and the emotions were strong & hefty.
Feel like crying on the mistakes i did, and the same time wants to re-joy the triumphs i had.
So mysterious yet so known, so aggressive yet so truce,
the song was nothing but like my own soul.
Such a emphatic effect it left, will not forget till the end.
It forced me to look the world the way it is, and not to judge people for who they are and where they live.

Agonized Memoirs

Some memories are really hard to get away with, they are “Slow Poison” which breaks our soul each day until we cruised them to begin a new journey. It reminds me few lines from a song “One Love” by “Blue”. The lines are “It’s kinda funny how life can change, can flip 180 in a matter of days”, perfectly filling the voids in the emotions I want to express. But somewhere down the line they remain in our heart forever. They keep us intact, and stop us from behaving in same old fashion. To end its neither good nor bad, and nothing less than a undefined mystery for us to solve.

Following are two such short poems, in the first one a lover is expressing emotions after a long break and in the second a boy showing his anger after being forsaked by his friends.

After a long break, today we crossed our paths again. Though saw only a glimpse but the past reappeared once again. Neither a friend nor a foe, but still admire her the most. Seeing her, even for a blink of an eye is a blessing in disguise for me & déjè vu for all of you. I hope the time will come when we are no more mere strangers, when we will be as close, as far we are today.

The time is changed, its no longer the same, some has shown they really are insane. Those who were saying hey i m your friend, now say behind closed doors, you are nothing but a joke. Now its time to re-think the way i think, re-look the way i look, re-choose the friends i have and re-hope, they sooner or later would realize that they were wrong and i was right.

Favorite Lines From Movies

Death….death can seem like a dream but seeing death really seeing it makes dreaming about it fucking ridiculous, may be there’s a moment growing up until something comes back, may be, may be I, all i know i begin to feel things again & wherever i was i knew there’s only one way back to the world and now is to use the place & talk.

– Girl, Interrupted

In any war there are calms between storm, there will be days when we loose our faith, days when our allies turn against us, but someday will never come that we forsake this planet and its people.

– Transformers 3

Being a warrior is not just strike your opponent down with a sword, is finding good reason to draw your sword in the first place.

– Immortals

Lives all about moments of impact and how they change our lives forever but what if one day we can no longer remember any of them.

What if some years of life just disappeared the next day you wake up??

– The Vow

Mother

“Mother” a word, that defines the meaning of care, love, affection, teaching, and inspiration, and without any doubt, a word with many, many meanings which can’t be said and written. Everyone loves her mom so much that they can give away their life for her. On the other hand she would take care of everything you need and the smallest things you can forget. She would wake up early in morning so that you can go to school on time, will not eat until you eat, would remain awake in nights with you during exams so that you can concentrate on studies. She do so many sacrifices, sometimes its hard to believe, how one can do so much for you. I don’t know about you but my mother really surprise me by her devotion. She really is a SILENT GUARDIAN, and a WATCHFUL PROTECTOR.

The following I dedicate to my Mother.

I will rise from my ashes once I die, will born again to the mother I love. Can’t pay back what you did, but can only pray you continue to live. I promise, as long as I’m there, you will never see any tears, I love you the most as you are the mother everyone hopes.

The Guilty King

Thousands of battles had been won and lost. Most of them were to fulfill nothing but self pride and only few were for justice. Some kings had made right choice but many had taken wrong path of battle which led to blood shed. Here are feelings of a king after winning a long fierce full battle, who now feeling guilty, helpless, and praying to god to give mercy to the innocent soldiers.

A long battle is won today but nothing compared with what it was yesterday, many lost & many saved but the wounds remain all the same. Now can’t bear the guilt it gave & yet have to smile at the victory which came.

I pray to god, show me the door to hell as it was my fault to begin and kindness & mercy to the soldiers who survived till the end, as they are nothing but puppets of my hand.

Unplanned Thoughts

Lonely roads, pale street lights, heavy clouds, stop signs & to add no friends, a dark life. Sometimes somewhere it happens but someday & for sure you will see yourself walking with your friends on a clear sunny day on those lonely roads giving you various directions to go.

Having an eye on something doesn’t make that yours, having something doesn’t make that yours forever. Sometimes you can chose when to have it, sometimes when to leave it but most of the times both come to you without a doorbell so till the time it is with you use it precisely & wisely.

These days life seem to be a book, so many things to write but running out of pages, running out of ink and running out of time, it’s changing so fast, can’t make out what is right and what is wrong but one thing is for sure, it will change my life forever. Sometimes awkward things inspire you so much that its hard for you to believe and the only thing you can do is HOPE..hope..hope.

You have two choices in life, either believe in so called destiny, be satisfied & continue to think the present is for a better tomorrow or have courage to dream, dare to think beyond what others feel what others think. Dare to sketch your own dreams and turn them into a reality tomorrow. BUT for some its neither, for them the whole notion of life is an abstract ready to be written and forgotten….

Some people have to learn & some have to wait their turn but that doesn’t imply they can’t win. Its just a matter of time they reach to the level they desire, so if you are among them then believe and cherish who & what you are and time will tell you what you really deserve.

Mistakes

“Today I again did a silly mistake in my exam, damn!!” how many times do you hear & use this very line ??

I think very often, don’t you. The core of the mistakes we do is our own behavior and attitude. For instance if someone is hasty he/she would do all the things in a rush thus missing out some very important directions and would end up doing so called “silly mistakes”.

In the same example, the person will also rush through daily life things like eating, playing, reading, talking etc. He/she would eat fast, would take decisions while playing without a second thought, will read fast and end up mis-judging words and would talk speedily. Though all these things are small but they do reflect who you are. After exams and all, only because of such behavior and attitude you end up saying “I again did a silly mistake”.This is just one example there are many other which could show this fact.

So what I suggest to all those who are having trouble is to relate the mistakes you do in exams with your daily life habits, i bet, you will definitely find some common pattern. Try improving upon those things first and I am sure, then you would never have to say “I again did a silly mistake”.

Mistakes make you cry, Mistakes make you feel caught, Mistakes take away all fun But Mistakes are the one which make you learn

3-1 Memories

3rd year 1st semester..no doubt the most important 6 months. Some have over performed and some under achieved the targets they had set, but I can’t even say either. For me 3-1 was nothing but a bag full of mixed emotions, was on lower side in terms of studies though I excelled in other aspects.

It was good in the beginning, was e’joying new subjects, new concepts. Test 1 went pretty good considering the time I spent studying, but suddenly lost interest, and the whole focus shifted to Quark (was important too at that moment of time). Few days passed, and one of the professor to my surprise called me, he was worried about me not coming regularly to classes, had 45-50 minutes interaction, the best I ever had with any professor till date, certainly very inspiring specially when he told me “You should end 3-1 is style”, but as many greats have said “External Inspiration is nothing but lust” which remains but falls soon after. Nevertheless I started with my classes again, and were going on pretty good but as usual with me nothing goes good for too long, in the first week of October decided to leave. Was tough decision though, but not accepted by my pals. This was, in a way good to get the interest back. Next came Test 2, was good with some and bad with others. I somehow managed decent marks in all subjects, in a hope to recover in compre (Final Sem Exams). Everything was going on very well until Waves (Cultural Festival), when I got interested in…, lost next few days getting it settled but after no outcomes, took some time to get over it. After few more days came compre, the preparation was decent enough to get decent grades but as many greats have said “You can’t win over time and destiny” I lost in style.

Overall, a semester to remember, lost few and learnt a lot, which I am pretty sure will help and as many greats have said “Future is what you learn is present” I am very optimistic about road ahead.

 To all my friends who didn’t performed the way they wanted…

Someday sometimes things don’t go the way you have planned but that doesn’t mean they will never, wait…wait…you will definitely see a perfect day a perfect time when everything will fall into place for you and only for you…don’t lose hope as my grandpa once told me “Hope is good thing, may be best of things and no good thing ever dies” . Try to focus on what you really want in life and don’t just blindly follow each other, and don’t ever try to step in someone’s else footsteps as you might end up going nowhere.

Manchester Anguish

9th December 2011, marked one of the biggest shock in the world football as ManUtd saw the exit from Champions League Group Stages. As a very big long-term ManU supporter its hard to believe, how could they can do such thing to all fans like me, really very disappointing. Pundits say its all because of the wrong tactics by SAF but i think the blame should go to all the recent injuries the team had. With Cleverly, Anderson injured i can’t see any creativity in the midfield from Carrick and Fletcher. Now to add Hernandez out for month, Young for atleast a month and the biggest setback is Vidic, out for the whole season. I think SAF should rely on young guns like Pogba n all and should atleast give them a chance to show their talent.  But still i am very optimistic about ManUtd this season and dedicate following lines to them.

Out today but will come strong again, will show to all that we are not weak as its just a phase, so don’t just mock as might be tomorrow for you all. We are young but clever with small & jones forever, don’t forget…we are still 19 & running and who knows if things go well after winter we can be 20 and counting.